There's No Place Like Home

I have heard many a song and have read many a story that talk about being homesick. Recently in my life, I have been able to greatly relate to these sentiments. Some of this is due to the fact that I have moved away from home and family, and have a natural pull towards mourning their absence.  However, I started feeling homesick long before I left home.

I have this aching feeling of being out of place, but not sure how to find rest; this nagging pain that eats away at any security, leaving emptiness. It’s like striving for something you can’t obtain, an itch you can’t scratch. It’s the feeling I don’t fit in on this world….and truthfully I don’t. Truthfully, my home is far from here.

For the majority of my life I have been afraid of death. Even after accepting the Lord as my Savior. I wanted to experience life, and feared I wouldn’t get the chance. I lived with the worry that I would never get to do all that I wanted to do. Recently though, I have embraced this new appreciation for getting to spend eternity with my Savior. I used to get so mad at people who said they were okay with dying. I thought they were just putting on to sound strong in their faith, but now I understand where they are coming from.

PLEASE DON’T GET ME WRONG…..I do NOT have a death wish. I still want to experience life and accomplish many things before I go home to my Heavenly Father, but now I understand the feeling of being “homesick”; just as Paul talked about in scripture. I DO believe I am here for a reason. I believe I am here to serve the Lord and that He has plans for me, but there are times I feel so sad and tired of this world. I long to be with Him face-to-face.

It feels so funny for me to write this. I truly never thought I would feel this way. It is just that my relationship with the Lord has grown from an, “eternal future someday,” to something so much more present and urgent. It’s growing and building each day, and of course I grow more impatient to spend time with Him. Time in a place where the things of this fallen world don’t apply, a place I’ll call home.  

I don’t mean this post to be melancholy. I want merely to speak my heart. It is a joyous feeling in my mind, to crave my Savior. I pray now as Paul did, to complete the work I have here with strength and conviction, before returning home.

Waiting,

RDM